I feel that many adults (me included) are suffering from some form of depression or childhood trauma, which results in some undesirable things that we do.Now, now don’t get me wrong. It’s nothing serious although in some cases the cases are really serious. It’s day to day “normal” thing. Like “Don’t speak, a child is supposed to be seen not heard”, and the child learns to shut up and fears to speak or express feelings to anyone, which resulted in the basis of dysfunctional future relationships because I truly believe in the importance of sharing and speaking and expressing our feelings and creating a safer space for everyone in the relationship to reciprocate the sharing. So when I encounter such adults in life, I see myself in them. I learned not to take the “abuse” or hurtful remarks or action against me as “personal” by taking this approach to see an aspect of myself in them. Internalising it to not take It personally, if that makes sense.
She’s judged, she’s made to feel that she’s to be blamed for her own rape by the very adult who was supposed to protect her and keep her safe. She’s shamed and labelled a slut. She’s only 12.Project Cahaya aims to provide a safe space for the children to express themselves and learn to trust themselves to heal and to trust the world again. These children are supposed to be protected and yet for some, fate and the adults around them betrayed that very early in their lives. If this makes you feel very uncomfortable, I am sorry. What I am sharing; it is very real. Child abuse happens throughout the world, many suffering in silence. Many with no voice; many don’t even have a choice to say No or walk away. https://youtu.be/M9BNoNFKCBI This is some heavy post for a brand new year but while we celebrate it is also apt to remember those who are not as fortunate as we are, if we don’t do anything about it, life goes on and nothing change. Let’s take a look at the actions taken by females and even males around the world in the last century. Is it all muscles and grit and all hard to be strong? Do we need to break the glass ceiling all the time and have our hands and body bleed each time we fight to break the glass ceiling? Not only women but humans in general and the existing discrimination in place. Women, and also the minority, especially in the last 100 years felt a need to emulate men in order to stand up for themselves, however is masculinity the only way to be strong? Is it a battle or a competition to see who is stronger? Why can’t we have mutual respect regardless of who we are? What does strength mean to you? S-T-R-E-N-G-T-H For me it means grace in adversity and the ability to gracefully exit when you want to. Strength is in the power to say No, and Enough, and move on. HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE, may the world be the best that it can ever be in 2018 and beyond. ❤️ All pictures and photographs are credited to Pixabay and my personal collection.
Instead let me bring your attention to my own experience where it doesn't matter which country or which flag you fly, ultimately everyone is the same. Some beg to differ saying we don't operate the same way we have different cultures we speak different languages. Yes you are right. And when you choose to see that humans are the same, you are right too. I may be an anomaly but hear me out, bear with me as I type this out. I grew up as the only girl of Chinese descent in my class for a whole 6 years in the same school. My playmates are of different tones of brown and yellow and yet we still play (and cry and made up almost immediately). When I scraped my knee I bleed, so did the other kids. Our blood is red. It's the same. And now fast forward 30 years my son is playing with a group of strangers in the playground of various ethnicities. He doesn't choose their colour he doesn't cringe at someone different than him. He's emulating me at the tender age of 4. Bless him. I plan to tell him to stay that way for as long as possible and be aware other people may judge us or react differently but that doesn't meant you have to react the same way.As a mother and a woman, I truly believe I don't need to be divided or take sides on which country is better than the other. The world is truly one big country. The universe is one big home for all of us. *Peace* #SueTiong
I always believe in the power of trusting your heart and trusting that each human being has a good heart despite whatever they do or say or how hard they look on the outside.You see, no matter how a person projects himself/herself, underneath it all, the heart has a little child who usually has fear in his/her heart due to some childhood perception or misunderstanding. I feel so strongly about it that I apply that to business as well. Like how a grumpy customer service personnel hides a heart that was hurt since age 5 after losing a close relative or family member or something someone dear said to a 7-year-old that make him/her believe it is truly wrong to be too happy because that will make people jealous so you should never laugh out loud or even smile. It may seem unimportant because for most people, "what do children know, right?", they will forget it sooner or later. Unfortunately, these seemingly unimportant incidents or even a phrase or belief won't be really forgotten, it is absorbed into the subconscious and affect the entire being and future of this person, it is activated each time a decision is made, on a subconscious level. I am not an expert but I have experienced a shift within myself with a steep learning curve in the past one year in releasing all the 'ghosts of the past' and to release the programming that contains misconceptions of the Truth that has been ingrained in me since I was very young. For example, my former programming: Up to only recently, I have always believed that Money is Evil. Money is Dirty. You can never be righteous and be rich, not both, you have to be either one. I was so fixed in my belief that I was not even aware it was affecting my very core being and I ended up on the extreme end and ended up being a Robin Hood. I did many work and explored all possible new knowledge I could gain and in seeking the Truth, I managed to be more aware of whatever is going on inside my heart... now I was thinking with my head for so long I ignored what MY HEART FELT. Inside there was a little girl who listened to stories from generations before of how hard it was for her ancestors to make it and live to see their children grow up and for babies to die due to the higher mortality rate back in those days and then she deduced that she should feel ashamed to have survived and lived. And another story of how times were so hard the family was so poor they cannot afford to keep many children and need more boys to work the field that her grandfather had to see his father drown his newborn baby sisters, year after year. She was horrified by the stories and deep down she wanted to stay 'loyal' to the dead grandaunts by staying poor because in a child's heart, rationality does not have a room. There are many levels to this higher awareness but that is already one huge example of this matter. Pm me on facebook if you would like to talk to me more about this. Back to the matters of the heart, I apply the feeling of good faith and always think the best of people especially when I meet new people whenever I expand my network. You see, not many people are comfortable to meet new people or to explore new places. I know I don't, although I don't show it sometimes. The fear of the unknown and to step out of the familiarity of your comfort zone is daunting even to me. It is with a deep breath and a mantra that I got through that uncomfortable feeling and fear of the unknown: Everyone is good, deep inside, whatever they say or do or how the body language is, the heart is still good, my reaction should be nothing but with compassion and love.
Through this mindfulness practice, I am more aware of how irritation creeps up and I make a conscious effort to feel more neutral by tuning in to compassion and love. Believe it or not, it is that simple. Hard work but simple, says Sue Tiong. That has won me many strong powerful relationships and some 'tough nuts', I crack them with love and sincerity just by watching my heart and not allowing negativity to creep into my heart just by a simple decision.Is it hard to keep at it? YES. Is it so easy to give up? YES. But I still continue at it and once a grumpy face tries to hide a chuckle, I know LOVE really wins at the end of the day and LOVE always reside in the heart, just covered by so many layers of self-protection from being hurt. We all have some wounds and hurts deep within our hearts that we bury deep inside. Once we acknowledge that we are all the same, relationships will flow more smoothly and true peace really happen from within, not without Love.
Oh yes, Business Relationship is that simple. Heart to heart. If your heart is not at peace, it shows. No one wants to do business with a fidgety person. May everyone find peace within.~ Sue Tiong www.meetsuetiong.com So have I gotten rid of my irrational belief, that Money is Evil, before you ask me for money or beg that I share my fortune with you, please view this video to get your answer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kYw1wCDXDhM It has been a humbling journey of self-awareness. I have all the healers and amazing support networks that I have the honour to meet and learn from. THANK YOU
Today is International Women's Day and may we all unite together in sisterhood and support each other!
No one woman is made the same yet our struggles are similar if not the same. Our emotions are the same, mothers feel the pain when another mother is feeling the pain, sisters feel the strain in relationship and bffs just get it and stay true and don't leave your side no matter how ugly your behaviour is for the day.
It is not really rocket science to deduce that WOMEN FOR WOMEN spirit is very much more needed in today's world where disparity and the gap is growing bigger when half of our sisters globally are being left behind due to them being born on the 'wrong side' of the world.
- Let us lend a voice to all the women who could not enjoy freedom of speech.
- Let us lend a hand to all the women who are physically confined and rendered helpless.
- Let us shed some light to all the women who are in the dark and denied basic education.
- Let us help in anyway we can for women to keep their children safe and sound, for women to have access to basic healthcare, for women to be able to have confidence and trust again in this world, to provide a beacon of hope to the women who felt the future is bleak and of course to all women out there, to let them know being different is beautiful, just the way we are born, no need for excessive and invasive procedures to conform to what the society deem as 'beautiful'.
Spread love, not hate. Happy Women's Day!A collection of random pictures of the women in my life including my baby girl and her god mother. I love being a woman and I am proud of girl power!
Happy Women's Day to all females! May your beauty shine inside out and may your heart be filled with peace and joy.www.meetsuetiong.com